12:35 AM

Boo.

I read it in the morning and Google the area code. It's a Washington state number.

Too many of my ex-boyfriends live or have lived in Washington state. I assume this must be Adam 2 because Saira just told me he's back in Denver and he's brought with him his nasty pill habit.

Adam 1 is still rockin' it WA and I have his number. Also, "boo" is not his style.

Who else? Aaron. Eye roll. No pls.

I don't respond all day.  I hadn't intended to, since I assume the two people it could have come from where individuals I wasn't interested in conversing with.

I am still logged into Michelle's Facebook account on my computer.  I was bored and scrolling through her feed and through that of others that we both know.

Just for shits I tossed the mysterious WA number into the Facebook search field.  I don't like Facebook but love the phone number search feature.

I had just been looking at Cory's profile so when he came up in the search results I assumed that I had not hit "Enter" or some other user-induced error.

Not so.

I responded, of course.  First:

Um boo.

Then something along the lines of like hey did you mean to text me this is jen sadly i don't have your number saved please tell me your name.

No response.

I woke up at 3 this morning. I checked my phone to see if he said anything.

Nothing.

So here I am today, all alone because Christina and Michelle are in onboarding and Maria is at the dentist and Heather left to work out early.  Alone with my thoughts, suspicions, theories, wishes, doubts, etc. etc.

I need a reprieve from this nightmare with Tanner. I love him but just cannot stand him anymore. I hate being around him. Just ugh. Draining, Exhausting. His immaturity is suffocating me.

So of course, I welcome a Cory interruption. It's been so long.  I always miss him and always want to be a Nosemary in his life.

I probably check Facebook monthly to see if there's anything new I can see.  He is one of those people with the super locked-down profiles who doesn't let you send him a friend request, only a message. I get very little from his but a bit more from whomever his latest love interest is.

I'm just consumed. I want to text him again. Or call him. But is this just me looking for flimsy life preserver to save me from succumbing to the shit lake that has become my relationship? Or is this that mystical there is only one for each of us thing and he is my one, regardless if I am his?

At least I have his number now. Who knows what I'll do with it.